Looking at the unnamed woodgrain on the floor, I wonder if just because I want you here ultimately means that you’re good or not.
A message from Anonymous
You're in a different city now, with a handsome guy and you look happy. There's no sense in stirring up old feelings, I think we just danced around each other being in other relationships and I was an immature kid. Just know you hold a warm place in my heart and you're nothing but some my fondest memories from high school. You're a beautiful soul and you're missed <3
Awe, this is so sweet. Did we go to high school together?
A message from Anonymous
You''ll forever go down as a "one that got away" for me. Longtime adolescent crush. Do I love you? Its been years and you still cross my mind. Means something.
Awe, who is this? You never told me how you felt?
A message from Anonymous
I come back to your blog so much. It makes me feel like I'm with you ever so slightly. I think I love you.
A little late, but I’m still curious. 😘
A message from Anonymous
This blog was a lot better when you posted pictures of your face and cleavage
I’m sure it was, anon. Who would disagree?
You are the calm in the storm that is this life.
you’re my muse because everything you touch turns to art. Every napkin doodle and smile and time you touch my skin as if it’s gold. You create art without knowing it and that’s why I love you. Every morning I wake up before you and get the privilege of seeing your face, so innocent and genuine. How you look and the way i feel is fucking art.
"Don’t give up anyone who thinks you’re a masterpiece"
A message from Anonymous
I miss you
Haha, maybe I miss you too! Who are you?
Dearly (Barely) “Adult Me”,
In light of @victoriabeckham‘s recent letter to her 18 year-old self, I realize maybe it’s a really good idea.
Emily,
I know that here, on your golden, 18th birthday, you are lying on a couch ill in the middle of the summer. I know that you had the day off work but volunteered to come in to your shitty pizza job because they needed staff. This is not an oddity. You will consistently value work and financial stability over a personal life. Be careful of this, because it is a slippery slope and may cause you to lose relationships you love.
I know that at 18, you’re living with your high school sweetheart that you love with every part of yourself. I know that he’s playing video games, sitting on a lawn chair, with the boy that lives in the apartment below you, but has made sure that you have an Arizona Green Tea (your favorite) and the comfiest blankets.
I know that your “dresser” is a plastic set of drawers that you didn’t even purchase yourself. I know that you don’t have much, but God are you happy.
And it may sound strange, but do not forget this. You do not need much to be happy. And remember that sometimes, taking the jump and moving to a new town where you hardly know anyone, and taking a minimum-wage job to see what happens, is the best thing you can do.
Savor this happiness, because things will change. Unpredictable circumstances will show you just how raw the world really can be. Despite heartbreak, death, and growing pains, you will preserver.
Despite the ugliest of circumstance, the person than can take care of you best is you. Some days will be more difficult than others, and that is okay.
Once you realize you’re on your own now, and you can do (nearly) whatever you want, you will begin to think of all the things you want to do. You will be afraid to do most of them. It will take a mixture of strawberry-flavored vodka and Welch’s Fruit Punch, in a mixture you’ve coined the “Breakfast at Tiffany’s”, for you to put your paintbrush to paper for the first time, put your fingers on a guitar, record yourself singing, or learn how to read palms. Be patient with yourself; have fun. You are your harshest critic and are much better at most things than you give yourself credit for.
You will go on dates - a lot of them. After many of them, you will feel worse than when you began, because (as you will learn) you are more selective than the majority. This will make you feel painfully isolated and lonely at times. You will hear many opinions and read many articles that try to make you feel as if this is an empowering quality. You will hate this about yourself. It will take years for you to recognize that your strength in this realm is perseverance as well. The only thing worse than failing is not trying.
My darling, be soft with yourself. Be patient. Love yourself the way you love others that speak to your soul.
Love whole-heartedly, smile at strangers, and give others the benefit of the doubt, even if some days if feels as if you cannot.
You will be much happier when you realize you’re in control of your happiness. You deserve to be happy, and don’t stand in your own damn way.
All of my love,
E
Dear woman,
Thank God for all of you. Every single curve and sassy retort. Thank God for the dimensions that you bring into this world, all in one package. Thank God for everything that makes you feel more “you” and everything that makes you feel empowered. Thank God for all of the men you will dismiss because you’ve evolved. Thank God you can flick someone off and touch your own clit with the same finger.
